Airport Screening

No, I don't mean the rather personal new pat-downs at security check points (I got one, and then smoked a cigarette).

I mean instead that I've discovered a great new 'true' personality test --- better than seeing how a person treats the waitstaff in a restaurant or how they treat their mother (c'mon, they know you're watching). Stick a person in a busy airport and see if they offer to help a single mom traveling alone with a baby. Anyone who does -- male, female, short, fat, bald, toothless, or hirsute -- scores big points for me in attractiveness.

I'm just back from an overseas trip with my 15-month old daughter and I was amazed to see who would help a single mom obviously in need of major assistance, and who would glance at their iPhone pretending not to see us. Amazed. Seriously, what the hell else do you have to do while you're waiting for your plane????

Here is my business plan: I will secretly videotape a person going through an airport and sell the raw footage to their prospective dates on match.com for a hefty price. Airport screening at its best.