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Saturday, December 25, 2010

Urban Myth vs. Reality

I have several single female friends who are also forty-something. They each live in different cities and I can honestly say that each is attractive, smart, funny and a great catch. Each of these women has the same take on dating, esp. dating after 40, and it goes a little something like this:

"There are no good men out there. Everyone left at this age has some major issue (crazy, mean, won't commit, lazy, socially inept, etc.) and that is why they are single."

After going on approximately 10,407 bad dates myself, I sometimes buy into this philosophy. You know, it's too late. All of the good ones are taken. Only the crazies are left.

But common sense tells me that some guys our age are going through divorces of marriages that just didn't work. Some are widowers. Some found out a spouse was gay. Some have been engrossed in school and career (like some other people we know) for the past 20 years and are just now coming up for breath.

Perhaps the biggest reminder that it DOES work for some women over 35 is a sampling of the single mom blogs out there. Every single mom blog I follow has one thing in common ... NONE of these women is single any more. Not one. And they all seem happy in their new relationships. In fact, they seem thrilled.

And so the search for truth continues ... and perhaps part of that truth is the reality you create in your own mind.