Bad Week

It is fair to say I've had a bad week. I had a fight with my surrogate, wanted to strangle my contractor, and felt that if I ever entered Home Depot again I'd have to torch the place. Yes, this has been a bad week. In fact, I saw That Guy today, and was totally disgusted with the whole thing - stupid, unlikely, annoying. You know, that rant.

An old friend of mine had the misfortune to call me right after the fight with my surrogate, and heard me crying, angry, and in a totally irrational "I'm right and she is wrong" tantrum reminiscent of elementary school. She said to me, "Wow, this must be really hard for you, because you don't take shit from anyone".

This statement set me back a few steps. I really don't take shit from anyone. When people give me shit, I fire them, break up with them, stop being their friend, delete them from my phone or hang up on them. Sometimes, all of the above. And I can't do this with my surrogate. I need her. I don't like being caught by the short hairs.

What does this say about me? Am I a really intolerant person? I don't think so, but what intolerant person thinks they are intolerant? Probably damn few. Is this why I'm single at almost 40? Perhaps.

An ex of mine used to say that when his friend got married, he and his wife would have huge fights and she would storm out of the house with her purse and stand on the porch. Eventually, she would get cold and come inside. He was trying to tell me that I just had to put up with his shit and that is the way that relationships work. I informed him that I don't carry a purse, but do own a car.

I'm not saying that I fire, break up with, delete or hang up on people without giving it the full college try. I really think I do. But when people don't show me the respect and consideration I try to show them, it really pisses me off. And boy, does it translate into a bad week.